I boarded the train and took my seat. The seat next to me was empty, but not for long. A mother boarded with her 5-year-old daughter sat down in the seat beside me. I offered my seat to the little girl but Mom said no, she'd sit the young one on her lap.
So here I am holding my roses, now with a little lady straining to see what I was holding.
"What ya got, mister?" she asked.
(Mom is getting a bit flustered and tells her to mind her business.)
I leaned the "package" over a bit and she looks and says loudly, "Ohhhh, ROSES!, who are they for?"
(Now, Mom is embarrassed and tapping her on the rear telling her to sit down.)
I said, "They're for my girlfriend."
She says again with a loud voice, "WOW, pretty RED ones, and a lot of them, too! Man, you really must have f***ed up!"
Needless to say, nearly everyone on the train was in stitches, except her Mom, who was now desperately trying to assume an innocent shade of invisible.